Chapter 2 - Dude Looks Like a Lady

Captain's log. Stardate 59999.0. We are en route to the Finden system. Now that my crew is aboard, and everything is flowing as smooth as I suspect it will flow – that damned space dock incident is going to cost me around 275 thousand dollars, maybe we can deal with these pests annoying the Findens.

Ranma takes the final sip of his coffee and groans loudly. He continues to record in his log.

Oh, who the hell am I kidding. Being assigned this crew makes me wonder what I could have possibly done to piss dad off so much. I have sent him several messages, but none of them have been answered. I even broke into his secure line, but he didn't want to talk. I know this is an official log, but I don't care -


Ranma slams his fist to the desk, and leans towards his COM terminal, making sure he is getting his point across.


Genma, who was on the other end, was doing his best to explain himself.

"Look, boy. You wouldn't know what an admiral has to go through around here. Be happy I gave you a crew at all."

"I could run this ship better by myself."

Genma turned on the offensive this time.

"You little ingrate! Show some respect to your father. You should thank your lucky stars you have a crew! Why, when I was a Captain I had to run back and forth from engineering to the bridge just to make coffee! And they didn't even have turbolifts back then!"

Ranma just scowled. His father's attempt to reverse the blame wasn't going to work this time.

"Ok pop. Just tell me. Why did you make Shampoo my first officer?"

Genma got up and ran to another part of his office. We still hear his voice.

"Computer, one glass of cold water. Five degrees Celsius." The computer complies. Then, splash!

"BRAGGH!" Genma-Panda explains to his son while holding up a sign. <Sorry, son! Can't talk! On my way to a diplomatic mission!>

The screen popped up to the United Federation of Planets logo and the phrase 'Transmission Terminated.'

"DAMN!" Ranma yells.


Ranma set his head down on his desk. He was damn near ready to start crying again, but a sudden feeling came over him. It was the 'If I do well I will show the old man a thing or two' feeling. Ranma sat up. Yes, that was how he was going to get his dad back. He was going to get his crew into shape and have them kicking ass by the end of the day.

Ranma stood up and walked out onto the bridge. He noticed none of his senior officers were there. He looked at his watch and realized that no one in the future wore watches. He looked over a no-name's shoulder at his panel. 1825. Everyone was down in ten-forward.

He didn't want to go, but he had promised Akane. He also thought to himself that he could use a drink. Ranma wasn't really a drinker, but when he thought about his crew another feeling came over him. This feeling must have been the 'maybe if I get drunk they'll fire me and I can go back to lifeguarding at the Y'. Ranma didn't much care for that either, mainly because he had to stay in female form, but it was a living. Besides, he met those nice village people. Funny how he got along with them better when he was in his male form.

Ranma nodded to himself in approval and skipped into the turbolift.

"Deck ten." He told the computer. The lift buzzed to life and whisked the captain to meet what might be his new friend. A man named Jack. Jack Daniels.

In ten-forward, there were a lot of people chatting with each other. There was also music playing. Some of the crew was near the windows dancing. Serena was one of them.

Actually, it seemed more like Serena was going into an epileptic seizure than dancing, but whatever floats your boat. After she knocked over the sixth crewmember, she sulked her way over to the bar and had a seat with Raye and Mina.

Raye was the first to start ragging on Serena about her dancing if you can call it that.

"Serena." She slurred. It would appear that Raye is drunk. "What do you call that dance you were doing up there?"

Serena, not realizing that Raye was being sarcastic, grinned. "I call that the 'Funky Monkey!'"

Raye laughed heartily. "I would call it the 'Help my finger's caught in a light-bulb socket'. It sucked girl!"

Mina just shook her head as Serena started to sniffle.

"Serena, don't listen to her." Mina comforted. "She's drunk and she doesn't know what she's saying."

Raye shook her head. "I know what I'm saying! I'm saying that Serena sucks!"

Serena let out one of her patented bawls, as she bolted from the bar, and out the door.

"SERENA!" Mina called after her. But, it was too late. When she's upset that girl can really sprint.

Raye turned to Mina and grabbed her shoulder. "Let her go. She knows I was just giving her a hard time. She'll get over it. She always does."

Mina was still upset with Raye, and this time her half-assed explanations weren't going to get her out of a lecture.

"Raye. Serena is a sensitive girl. She can't handle criticism like you and I. I know you just think that your giving her the riot act is all in fun, but she doesn't understand that. I want you to apologize to her. What do you say?"

Raye just looked Mina in her baby blues, and said, "I have to pee. Excuse me." Raye stumbled off her seat and headed towards the restrooms. Mina just chugged the rest of her drink.

"Women problems, eh?" A deep voice says to Mina. She looks up. The voice belongs to the bartender. The bartender is a handsome man with dark hair pulled back into a ponytail. He had a goatee and was wearing a 'Home of the Whopper' apron over his Starfleet uniform. He didn't have any rank pips on his collar, making Mina assume that he was just an enlisted crewman.

Mina laughed at the remark. "Yeah, my friend Raye is always being mean to our other friend, Serena."

The bartender laughed. "Well, I feel that they really care for each other deep down." Mina nodded in agreement.

"But I still wish she would be nice to her. Serena is a great girl, who's far away from home. She's just a bit clumsy, and somewhat ditzy, and not very organized-"

The bartender cut her off. "I get the point. However, I should note that we aren't really THAT far from Earth if you acknowledge how far away some other ships are."

Mina thought about this for a second. "You know what I mean though."

The man nodded. He noticed Mina's empty glass. "Another?"

Mina nodded her approval and slid her glass towards him. He walks over and fills her up. "So what's your name?" He asks.

"Mina. Mina Aino."

"Nice to meet you, Mina. I'm Gosnell." They shook hands.

"Any relation to the Gosnell the class of the ship is named after?"

Gosnell pondered this for a second. "You know, I've often wondered that myself. See, I think the class was named after a human named Gosnell. I'm not human."

"Oh? What race are you?"

"I am from a very distant planet known as Cantrell. The Kunos destroyed my home over a thousand years ago. They swept down and assimilated everyone in sight. Lucky for me I was gobbled up by a tornado, unrelated to the attack, and was somehow shot into space where an old man named Gargle Listerine saved me."

Mina was impressed. This guy was over a thousand years old. And he survived one of those damn shooting tornados. "So how did you end up here?"

"Well, that story is somewhat embarrassing. I bet the captain in a poker game that if he won I would be his bartender on his ship, and then follow him till he died, or till I got bored. Well, he beat me. All I had were a 10, Jack, Queen, King, and Ace of hearts. He had four sevens."

"Um, Gosnell. I hate to tell you this but you had a royal straight flush. That beats what the captain had."

The look on Gosnell's face could have shattered glass. He hung his head in shame. "Where were you before I signed that two-hundred-year contract?" Gosnell grabbed a bottle of vodka and downed it in one gulp.

"You going to be ok?" Mina asked.

"I am now. This stuff is STRONG!" Gosnell grinned.

It was about this time that Raye comes straggling back to her seat. She looks up to Gosnell.

"Hit me." She says.

Gosnell shrugs and draws back, and WACK! He punches Raye right in the jaw. Raye looks up and glares at Gosnell with a look that could have broken Gosnell's earlier look.

"WITH A DRINK YOU MORON!" Raye screams at Gosnell. Gosnell shrugs and grabs Mina's drink. He then throws the contents in Raye's face.

Raye leans over the bar and grabs the now frightened Gosnell by his collar. "I want you to put some Rum and some Coke into a glass and then set it on the bar, right here in front of me. If you hit me or throw another drink in my face I will rip all your hairs out one by one and toss you into a quantum torpedo tube and shoot you up the ass of a Klingon elephant. Got it?"

Gosnell nods and runs off to make the drink. Raye sits back down and wipes herself off. She notices Mina chuckling silently.

"WHAT?!" Raye scowls.

"Nothing." Mina grins.

It was about this time when the Captain walks into ten-forward. He glances around the room. No Akane. Just like her. Bitch and moan and whine to get me down here, but she's not down here herself. Well, at least Shampoo isn't down here either.

Ranma turned and walked up to the bar. He takes a seat next to Raye. He looks and grins.

"Counselor. Commander. How are you two?"

Raye looks at him slowly and tries to force a grin. "I'm happy!" Raye's head then smacks the bar.

Mina turns to Ranma as well, with a more sincere grin on her face, and doing a much better job of holding her head up.

"I'm good Captain. Looking forward to getting to the Finden system."

The captain smiled back at Mina and sent a chuckle to the back of Raye's head. He then looked up at Gosnell. "Hey, Gosnell. Hit me with water. Can't get drunk. On duty."

Gosnell grinned. "Coming right up!" He walked on over to the replicator.

Ranma started to feel concerned about Raye. "Is she OK?" He asked Mina.

Mina starts to answer when Gosnell walks back and throws the Captain's water in his face. Ranma becomes Ranma-chan (RC).

The look on Mina's face was one of shock. Of all her years in the Starfleet Science Corps, she had never seen a man change into a woman. Well, she thought. Do changelings count? Mina began to wonder about this. What if the captain was a founder? Think of all the press coverage she'd get if she found him out. Swarms and swarms of men would be swooning over her. Over Mina Aino. The savior of the federation!

Granted the war was over and the Founders were pretty much out of the picture, but one serving, as the captain of Starfleet's new flagship, has to be considered a big deal!

Mina stealthily looked to the captain. He was still thinking of some swear words to use on Gosnell. This was her chance. If she could get some blood from him, she would be able to prove he was a changeling.

Mina started darting her eyes all over. No one in the whole room had a medical hypospray. Gosnell having removed the medkits earlier for some unexplained reason that made sense in Gosnell's world. She then spied some silverware. It appeared she was going to have to use the crude method.

Mina slowly reached across the bar and grabbed the silverware. She decided on a steak knife. She figured that just in case she was wrong, a steak knife would do the least amount of damage to the captain.

RC was just coming out of the usual shock she felt when her uniform tightened up around the chest. And the pure thought that someone would just throw water in her face kind of shocked her too. RC opened her mouth to start swearing at Gosnell when she felt a poking at her arm.

She turned. Mina, having partially climbed over Raye, was hacking at her arm with a steak knife. It was a very dull steak knife. Mina was putting all her energy into it, but she couldn't even get it to break the skin. The knife blade just bent, and finally snapped off.

"AINO! What are you doing?" RC yelled.

"You're a changeling, aren't you?" Mina screamed back. She turned to Gosnell. "Hand me that beer bottle."

Gosnell, not one to sit idly by when he could help instigate trouble, complied. Mina took the bottle and SMASH right over the top of RC's head. RC screamed. That hurt! Mina also screamed when the blood from the cut she managed to make with the bottle didn't change into changeling goo.

"Oh damn." Mina moaned.

RC gave Mina the once-over. "Do that again, and watch what happens." She warned.

Mina slithered back to her seat. She decided now she needed to be on her best behavior. Maybe her last boyfriend was right. Maybe she was too suspicious. Naaa. She thought. He just said that to cover up the fact he was cheating on me. Mina nodded her approval to that thought.

RC managed to shake off the pain of the beer bottle. She turned to Gosnell. Gosnell wasn't sure if he should be afraid or not.


Gosnell smiled. "You said 'hit me with a water.' So, there you go." Before Ranma could fly across the bar to kill Gosnell, Raye turned to her and grabbed her breast.

"Ooo! You're cute!" She said. "Well built too!"

RC screamed. She was not fond of it when her boobs were manhandled. Except when her doctor did her physicals. He has such soft hands.

RC started to back away. What was up with this chick? RC tripped as she tried to escape. Raye knew what time it was. She pounced on RC and proceeded to kiss her. Of course, due to RC's patented bad luck, Shampoo and Akane came into the bar at the same time from opposite sides of the room.

"RANMA!" They both screamed.

RC was about to try and explain, but the moment she opened her mouth, Raye slipped her tongue in. This of course made Ranma freak out and made Shampoo and Akane, well, freak out in their own way.

The two women jumped onto Raye, proceeding to pound the hell out of her. Well, Shampoo was beating Raye, while Akane was beating Ranma. Raye, however, was not one to take this lying down, so she fought back. This ignited a brawl between the three women, leaving RC to be trampled on the bottom of the dogpile.

One of the people who were dancing near the windows saw the fight.

"FIGHT!" He screamed. This was the fuse that set off a riot in 10-forward. Everyone in the bar started brawling with each other. Well, almost everyone. Ryouga was just sitting at his table. Alone. Nursing his drink.

Mina decided that she'd gotten into enough trouble for one day and that it would be best for her not to be included in any of this. She vaulted over the bar and hit the floor. She noticed Gosnell ducking behind the bar as well, screaming into his COM panel.

"Yes, Mousse. I said RIOT! Now get your lackeys down here now!" Gosnell closed the connection and grinned at Mina. "I must now do my duty and try and stop this fight." He started to stand.

Mina grabbed Gosnell's shoulder and began to object. Gosnell placed his index finger to her lips. "Quiet child. I will be OK." He kissed Mina on the forehead and began to stand.

Mina sat back, in awe. The man. Gosnell. He was so brave.

Gosnell hopped on top of the bar. "PEOPLE! PEOPLE!" He bellowed. Everyone stopped fighting and looked at him.

"Can't we all just get along?" He pleaded. His cries went unheard as several glasses came flying at his head. Gosnell let out a scream that resembled a seven-year-old girl and dove back behind the bar. He looked to Mina, who somewhat looked disappointed.

"Nice try." She comforted. A crewman came flying over the bar, slammed into the wall, and slid to the floor.

The doors to 10-forward hissed open and about 50 of Mousse's security officers came running in, all armed with duck-shaped potty trainers. The security officers immediately went to work beating the rioters.

Ryouga was starting to get frustrated. How was he supposed to properly wallow in self-pity with all this damn noise? It wasn't till someone's tooth fell in his drink that he snapped.

He hopped up onto his table.

"HEY! SHUT UP!" He screamed. It was at this time that he received a duck-shaped toilet trainer to the head.

"Ok bitches." He grumbled. "BAK-SI-KEN-TETSU!!" Ryouga applied the breaking point to the table. As it began to explode, he realized what a horrible mistake he had just made. This table was glass. He screamed. "DAMN!"

Sickbay was the location most of the rioters were at. The others were in the brig, being sobered up. Akane's staff was busy, mostly pulling glass fragments out of various locations.

Akane got the patient who took the most damage. Ryouga. Normally the breaking point doesn't hurt him, but usually, he does it on rocks. Rocks will bounce off the body. Glass on the other hand will embed itself in a person’s skin.

Ryouga was lying face down on Akane's exam table. His pants were pulled down to his knees. It seems that all the large pieces of glass ended up stuck in Ryouga's butt. This made Akane very uncomfortable. She was doing her best to remove the fragments without looking at, well, it. His butt.

Akane's embarrassment was nothing though. Nothing compared to what Ryouga felt. There is no color of red to describe what color his face was. This wasn't just because of him being pants down in front of Akane, but also because this was secretly a fantasy of his. Well, minus the horribly painful glass shards.

The doors to sickbay opened. Ranma walked in. He was all male again. He had finally managed to explain to Shampoo what had happened. That had taken him a while, and Shampoo was the easy one. Now time to work on Akane.

He walked up to where Akane was.

"Hi?" Akane just ignored him.

"RANMA!" Ryouga screamed. "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"

Ranma looked around. He didn't see Ryouga anywhere. Did he? He looked at the table. Yikes. Not a sight he wanted to see. He walked around the front of the exam table and squatted. Yup there, with his head hanging over the edge of the table, was Ryouga.

"Ryouga!" Ranma chirped. "You're looking well!"

"SHUT UP!" Ryouga yelled back.

Ranma chuckled and walked back to Akane. "Akane. I'm sorry. Even though it wasn't my fault."

Akane stopped and turned to him. "It's never your fault, is it?"

Ranma missed the sarcasticness in that. "Usually not."

Akane just shook her head. "I have work to do."

Ranma, realizing it was useless at this point to argue further walked off, deciding the bridge is a much friendlier place now.

He walked out the doors of sickbay and up the hallway to the turbo lift. He hit the call button and waited. He was mad. It's been a long time since he was mad like this. He wasn't mad at Akane, at Mina, or even at Raye. He was mad at himself. He felt he was getting slow, even sloppy, lately. There were times when no one could have gotten him the way Gosnell did.

Ranma realized that he has been distracted lately. That and he has become complacent. Ordering people to do things for you is an easy way to get out of the practice of doing things himself.

Ranma realized that if he was going to have a chance against the Kuno's, he was going to have to work on his mental discipline. If he continued to get distracted it might mean the death of him and his crew.

He really didn't know what was distracting him though. He hoped he could figure it out before too long. It's hard not to be distracted when you don't know why you're being distracted in the first place.

The lift hissed open. Mina was in there. He stepped in with her. The doors close.

"Bridge," Ranma ordered the lift.

"Computer, pause." Mina cut in.

Ranma turned to Mina.

"Captain. I'm sorry. I’m sorry I tried to stab you with the knife and sorry I hit you with a beer bottle." Mina said shyly. It wasn't like her to be this shy, but she really felt stupid for what she did.

"Commander, your intentions were good. Didn't do any real damage and I heal fast." Ranma replied. He smiled at her with the old Saotome charm, trying to lift her spirits.

Mina smiled back. The last man she hit with a beer bottle didn't take it so well. But he deserved it. Ranma didn't.

 "Continue," Mina told the computer. She, however, was curious. "What's up with that whole guy/girl thing?"

Ranma sighed. Just thinking about it hurt his stomach. "You ever hear of Jusenkyo?"

Mina shook her head.

"It's a cursed springs training ground. I fell into the spring of drowned girl. Now whenever I get hit with cold water, I turn into a girl, and hot water reverses the effect."

"Gotcha. Is there a cure?"

"Yes, but it’s in China."

"Oh, I see," Mina replied. She wasn't sure why the Captain didn't just beam down there and cure himself when they were in orbit around Earth, but she was sure he had his reasons.

The lift doors opened. Ranma and Mina walked onto the bridge. The first thing they saw was Shampoo and Raye choking each other. Ranma ran over and broke up the fight.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?" Ranma screamed.

Shampoo grabbed a hold of Ranma. "Stupid girl try to steal Ranma!"

Raye interjected. "I did not! She's pissed for some reason! She said I kissed her fiancée in 10-forward!"

Ranma groaned. "Shampoo. Sit. Raye, don't worry, you didn't." Ranma felt the less Raye remembered, the better off he'd be.

The doors hissed open again. Ryouga came walking, very slowly, out of the turbo lift and down to his station. He placed a pillow on his chair and sat down extremely slowly.

"Captain," Mina said. "We're approaching the Finden system."

"Good, Ensign, slow to impulse, standard orbit over Finden Three."

"Aye, sir." Ryouga groaned. The ship shuddered and slammed to a stop.

"Ryouga?" Ranma asked.

"Sorry," Ryouga responded.

"Engineering to the bridge!" Serena's voice came over the communicator.

"Go ahead, Commander," Ranma replied.

"Tell whoever did that not to do it again. That's not good for the clutch or the structural integrity field, or something that has a lot of flashing red lights on it. You know it would be a lot more useful if they'd spend as much money on labels as they did on pointless flashing lights!"

"Already under control, Serena. Thanks. Saotome out." Ranma stood up and walked to Ryouga. "Did you catch that?"

Ryouga scowled. "I said sorry!"

Ranma walked back to his seat. "Mousse. Do you see anything on the sensors?"

Mousse gave the panel a good look. "No!"

Shampoo turned to him. "PUT YOUR GLASSES ON STUPID!"

Mousse slid his glasses that were on top of his head over his eyes. "Oh yeah. Eleven fighter-type ships and one battlecruiser in orbit on the other side of the planet."

Ranma groaned. "Ryouga, catch up with them and match their orbit. Mousse, hail them."

Both officers complied. Mousse was the first to answer. "The battle cruiser commander is hailing us."

"Ah, well on screen," Ranma answered as he stood.

On the main view screen, an older man appeared. He was wearing a suit and tie. He had gray hair. He looked at Ranma and started to laugh.

"You want something?" He asked.

Ranma didn't know why he was laughing. But he wanted to know. "I am Captain Ranma Saotome of the Federation Starship Sisko. Why are you pestering the people of Finden?"

The man stopped laughing. "The Federation, huh? Well, I am Roy Captain Sha'Na Nana. And this planet needs to be taught proper articulation."

This threw the whole bridge crew off. "What?" Ranma asked.

"We have been monitoring their newscasts. They have mispronounced too many words. For the sake of good journalism, we must step in."

Ranma was a little confused, but he knows what they meant. He's seen Finden newscasts. They did mispronounce quite a few things. Regardless Ranma knew what he needed to do.

"I understand your intentions, Captain Nana. However, the Federation wants me to ask you to leave." Ranma told the old man.

"NO! We will not leave until our work is done! If you don't let us continue, we will destroy you!"

Ranma doubted that is possible. He turned to Mousse and signaled for him to mute the transmission. Mousse complied. Ranma turned to Shampoo.

"What are their defensive capabilities?" Ranma asked.

Shampoo looked at her terminal and grinned. "Silly men had two Xenon Rocket Launchers on each fighter and a low yield plasma cannon on the cruiser. That all. No match."

Ranma nodded to her. He then turned to Raye. "What do you think?"

Raye sighed. "They're willing to die for their beliefs. They truly think what they are doing is just."

"All right. Open channel." The speakers chirped. "Captain Nana. We understand what you are trying to do, but this planet is a member of the United Federation of Planets, and you must leave it be. The Federation grants these people certain rights, including the right to misarticulate. I will warn you now, if you don't leave on your own, we will remove you by force."

Captain Nana just about blew a gasket. "Right to misarticulate? We'll see about that!" The screen went back to the shot of the Roy ships as Captain Nana closed the channel.

"Great. Mousse shields up. Shields. Not a torpedo." Ranma ordered.

"Yes sir." Mousse replied. The shields buzzed to life.

Outside, the Roy ships assumed an attack posture. They fired. Fourteen rockets came out of the Roy ships. Each rocket hit the Sisko's shields and bounced off.

Ranma didn't want to fire on the ships, but what choice did they have? Hopefully, they would get the point after the first shot and buzz off.

"Mousse, target the third ship to the left. Fire one torpedo." Ranma ordered. Mousse obeyed. The torpedo fired from the Sisko. It hit the targeted Roy ship. Once the fireball dissipated there was just a small amount of debris.

"Captain," Mousse said. "The Roy Captain is hailing us."

"On screen." Ranma grinned at the Roy Captain appeared. He was white with fear.

"Captain Saotome. Our work here is done. We will be on our way! Give the Federation our best!" The screen returned to the external view as the ships warped towards home.

Ranma grinned. "Good work everyone. That was a job well done-" Ranma was cut off by a frantic Mousse.

"CAPTAIN!!!" He screamed. "A SHIP! LONG RANGE SENSORS! AHHHHH!!" Mousse was slapped very hard by Shampoo.


"A cubical-shaped ship is on an intercept course at warp 9.75."

"Cubical shaped?" Ranma looked confused.

"Err – Cube shaped." Mousse replied.

"Thank God. I was worried that the people from the planet Dilbert were pissed again-" Ranma cut himself off when he realized that cube-shaped was much worse than cubical-shaped.

"Mousse! Can identify?" Shampoo asked.

"Yes." Mousse whimpered. "It's Kuno."

Everyone on the bridge gasped.

"Mina," Ranma said. "Time to intercept?"

"Two hours, Captain."

"Send a priority one message to Starfleet, Mousse. Let them know what's up and request instructions."

"Shampoo have instruction. Run like hell."

Ranma nodded. "Ryouga. Set course, 1-7-5 mark 0-1-6. Maximum warp."

Ryouga complied. "Course and speed laid in, sir."

That felt good. Ryouga just called him sir. He'd been looking forward to this day for a very, very long time. It made Ranma feel that he had finally won their 'battle.' Ranma was king. King of the world!

"CAPTAIN!" Shampoo screamed.

"WHAT?! Oh yeah, Engage!" Ranma chuckled nervously. Again with the distractions.

The ship turned about-face and shot off.

"Captain," Mina spoke up. Ranma knew this was bad news. The Ops officer rarely spoke unless spoken to unless it was bad news. "At our current speed, the Kuno cube will still overtake us in four hours."

Ranma hit his communicator. "Engineering! Serena, can we get any more speed?"

Serena got up from the terminal she was playing computer solitaire on.

"I'll see what I can do, Captain. Engineering out." Serena walked to the middle of engineering.

"OK PEOPLE! We need to get more speed!"

"But Commander!" One of the engineering crew complained. "We're already going warp 9.55!"

Serena screamed. "THAT'S FAST!!" She sat back down. "Well, the captain said we need more, so give us more!"

She was responded to with several 'yes ma’ams. She whimpered for a bit, but then stood up. I'm going to show that Raye, she thought. I am going to show here that I can be a good officer. I'll show here that I am not a klutz! Serena looked around. Which one is the engine computer? Serena noticed that most of the crewmen were standing around one particular station. Serena ran over to help her crew on the warp engine, but she tripped on her hair and fell to her face.